Month: December 2020

Lord I am sorry for what I have made it

Almost twenty years ago my husband found these verses in Romans. We quickly adopted them as our life verses. 

Therefore, I urge you, brothers and sisters, in view of God’s mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God—this is your true and proper worship. Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.
Romans 12:1-2 (NIV)

We decided in 2002 that we were no longer going to go with the flow of society but go against the grain.  We were going to live this out every day. We would renew our mind and be transformed. We wanted to offer our bodies as a living sacrifice. We were ready to go and do what the Lord asked us to do. 

Fast forward to 2020. I have always known there was a “therefore” to start Romans 12. I had also been told that you always need to stop and find out what the “therefore”is there for. 

Ok I get it better late than never right? 

I decided to just go back one chapter to 11, and start reading. Wow! I think I had skipped that chapter in all my readings. Paul is giving his partial resume, then he is talking about how we have been grafted into the family of God. I was really loving it until I turned the page in my Bible and read verse 35. 

“Who has ever given to God, that God should repay them?

In following the rabbit trail of reference verses it took me to Job chapter 41 verse 11. God is talking: 

Who has a claim against Me that I must pay? Everything under heaven belongs to Me.

Why did those verses bring me to my knees? Because I need to repent. I cannot tell you how many times I have prayed this prayer; 

“Lord thank you for allowing me to be your hands and feet.” 

Then in the next breath would come this… 

“Lord when will it be my turn to see a blessing? I have done all this for You. When, Lord? I am tired.”

When God showed us the verses in Romans it was supposed to be a motto to live by. It ended up being the foundation to a ministry that was extremely taxing, not just monetarily, but also physically and mentally. 

I am forever grateful that I was afforded the opportunity to be in full time ministry for so long. I am not proud of the jealousy, competition, and the business it became. Instead of a time to walk in a relationship similar to the outline found in Titus 2, it became about numbers of lives changed on a spreadsheet in order to keep the funders happy. 

And in turn my prayer was no longer, “God I offer my body as a living sacrifice,” but “Lord, look what I am giving up. So what’s in it for me?”

My prayer for 2021 is going to be, Lord, I offer myself. Grant me knowledge and wisdom that can only come from you. Lord embolden me to tell others about Your greatness, not because of what You may or may not do, but because of Who You are.” 

Our job as Christ followers is to glorify God for no other reason than because He Is the Great I AM. I will end with Psalms 145:1-3 (NIV)


I will exalt you, my God the King; I will praise your name for ever and ever. Every day I will praise you and extol your name for ever and ever. Great is the Lord and most worthy of praise; His greatness no one can fathom.

“It” will Rule You

As I was researching the scriptures for a study I am writing, these verses in Genesis stood out.

Then the Lord said to Cain, “Why are you angry? Why is your face downcast? If you do what is right, will you not be accepted? But if you do not do what is right, sin is crouching at your door; it desires to have you, but you must rule over it.” Genesis 4:6-7 (NIV)

Cain’s offering was not acceptable to the Lord. The scriptures record just earlier in the paragraph that “In the course of time Cain brought some of the fruits of the soil as an offering to the Lord.” (vs3)

In the course of time Cain brought some of the fruits… not first fruits… just some.

Then the Lord continues talking with Cain. “Why are you angry?”

I wonder how many times God really wants to look at us and ask “Why are you upset?” 

God already knew Cain’s heart. God was warning him. Sin is crouching at your door. It desires to have you. You MUST rule over it. 

This was a warning to a man whose anger was about to get the best of him. Not but a few verses later, Cain has killed Abel. 

This made me think how many warnings God has given us? Sin is crouching at your door…. YOU MUST RULE OVER IT… 

The problem is many times we get in a cycle of letting life happen and therefore we allow the desire of “it” to rule us. 

What has God been warning you to rule over before it takes you? 

Cain’s was anger and jealousy. 

Is yours anger or losing your temper? 

Is it gossip, jealousy or a sexual sin?

What about laziness? Or is it being a work-a-holic? 

Maybe it’s an addiction that you may find yourself slipping back into? 

I pray today is the day that you listen to the Lord and heed His warning to start ruling over “it” before the consequences of it taking over you involve others and not just yourself.