This is a re-post from a blog I did in 2012
Today I woke up with a heart ache.
I could not get out of my mind the women and moms who are working in our adult entertainment district. God has laid them on my heart to pray for their safety. I cannot say that he has had me pray that they will get out of the industry but to pray they stay safe. I know you are right about now saying “get me this women’s phone number. She has gone off the deep end”, but before you stone me hear me out.
As an organization we have worked with many women who have worked in the Adult entertainment industry. To sit down and listen to their stories would make you cry… Why, why did you only see this as your only option?
About 2 years ago I was running a Job Readiness Program and the State sent clients that were on Families First to my class. I had a young women that was not only about to lose all her benefits for her and her children (food stamps and healthcare) but someone was threatening to call DCS because she was not providing the basics for her children.
She tried and tried to get a job but at that time jobs were a little harder to come by. One day after class she approached me and said, “I hear what you are saying, but right now I need to make some money.”
For the next 20 minutes I sat down and just listened to the heart of a mom who wanted more than anything to stand on her own two feet. She loved her kids and would do anything not to have them taken away. She had walked away from an abusive boyfriend and was trying NOT to rely on a “guy” for anything. She wanted to make it on her own.
I started asking questions about what she used to do before she moved here. She told me she was a stripper. I think she was waiting for me to say “Oh No, you can NEVER do that again”; but instead I just listened. I did not want to make her feel any lower than she already did.
I heard from her the next day when she did not show up for class, she had a job and she was providing for her and her children. Was the job the most ideal? NO, but she was not relying on an abusive boyfriend to make sure she was taken care of.
Why do I tell you this story? Well as I was driving up 65 North into Franklin today my mind started wandering to 15 years ago this month when my not so perfect marriage started going awry. My husband was unhappy and had started having an emotional affair with my best friend. I was just beside myself when that day came and he said to me “I just don’t love you anymore”. We started separating things and he started paying child support. I got the house but with me not working what was I to do?
I had been a stay at home mom and had no marketable job skills. My self-esteem took a plunge which in turn started a very quick downward spiral. How could this be happening, we went to church every time the doors were open, we participated in every event, even organized them.; kids choir and Bible bowl were my Sunday afternoons. Now I am sitting in the bathroom asking “how am I going to make ends meet”.
I needed money fast and knew that going through the paper, to interviews and trying to put on a show that everything was ok was NOT going to work. So what is a girl to do? Oh I know, I had just lost a lot of weight and looked pretty good, so let me find out where the local Strip Clubs are and I will learn to swing around a pole.
You see, emergency mode is what I was in. I needed to provide for my 3 children and fast easy money was how I was going to make it.
Now back to why my “heart aches” for the women that are in this industry? Because that could have very easily been me; Someone’s daughter, someone’s mother, someone’s Aunt, someone’s sister. Every one of those ladies has a different story as to why…. But in our busyness of the day do we really want to sit down and get to know “the local stripper”?
Jesus does…
My heart still aches for the women who see this as their only option. If you know of young woman in this profession, please get them my information. I would love to talk with them and equip them and empower them. 